We all have insecurities. Some people are more confident than others. However, even the most confident person has something in the back of their mind they wish they could change.
Enter kids. We want to raise strong, confident kids. Insecurities can be difficult to avoid so it’s important they know that its okay to talk about them in order to overcome them.
While we’re raising our kiddos, we might worry about sensitivities we have about our “flaws”. And by “we,” I mean me. I certainly can’t speak for anyone but myself, but I suspect it may be more common than people admit.
In my case, when my daughter was born, it occurred to me that one day I would have to explain to her why my back is different than (pretty much) everybody else’s.
That day was last week.
She simply said, “mom, why is your back like this?”
At first I was crushed. Luckily, I was able to quickly pull it together.
My back can sometimes be a touchy subject for me so I used to be nervous about how I would handle it. The biggest challenge was to act as if everything was fine. That I was fine. And I am, for the most part, but we all have our setbacks.
She doesn’t need to know about pain from my past. One day we can talk about it more in depth if necessary.
Perhaps if she has a run-in with a bully at school. Or one day, she might need help finding confidence in herself.
Or most importantly, from first-hand experience, I can teach her how to accept herself for who she is.
But nothing heavy yet, she’s only four.
So, instead of getting into specific details about my condition or past, I was able to turn it into a life lesson about loving people for the way they are. And as I said, she’s four, so I tried to keep it as simple as possible.
I explained to her that everyone is unique in their own way. No matter what their personality is or if they look different. We’re all individuals and that is what makes us special.
She seemed to understand what I was saying. And knowing my girl, we’ll be talking about it again soon. She is a master of the word “why”. And now that I know it’s coming, I can confidently say, bring it on.
Have you had to talk to your kids about something you’re sensitive about? How did you handle it?